To all the single ladies - you're fine : Terri Hilmey at TEDxBuffaloWomen

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  • Published: 16 January 2013
  • In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

Comments • 231

  • Rebirth0313
    Rebirth0313  5 일 전

    If only I understood this ten years ago! Everything rings true for me!

    • CCW Noob
      CCW Noob  개월 전

      Being single is by definition selfish to the entire human race. Whether you believe in God or Mother Nature, men and women were not meant to be separate. In the truest and simplest sense, we would all otherwise die off. Rationalizing being single is just another modern snowflake millennial behavior but for those types, not procreating and just dying off is actually good in the grand scheme of things.

      • rasronin
        rasronin  개월 전

        Life is not about being happy. Not having children is the most selfish thing you can do. You got a chance at life, pass it on. Your fulfillment will come from the meaning in life you find. Nothing sadder than a hospital patient with no family. Women are superficial nowadays. The house looks nice sure, but it would be better for the earth if you never existed at all. The number one goal in life is to pass on genes and continue life a process billions of years in the making and larger than your silly little existence of entertainment and pretty things.

        • AMLAN ADITYA MALLICK AMLAN ADITYA MALLICK

          I am actually happy because THOTS won't be around to take child support and alimony. All them smashing to the WALL.

          • Mark Twain
            Mark Twain  2 개월 전

            Hey, all you American overweight, under educated (gender studies), greedy, grasping , student debt laden, solid 5's , 6., 7,and weak 8s, out there. Hang on, your subservient solid 10 prince is just around the corner. LMAO..

            • Palak Patel
              Palak Patel  5 개월 전

              You got married and your husband died before you. You raised kids and none of them showed up on your death day. On your death bed, you realized that marriage was worthless after all...and you died with a regret of not doing what you really want to do in your life. Wow, single people definitely know that there will be no one on their death day by their side. But married people live in false hope that they won’t die alone. Wow, What a disappointment at death bed..!!

              • one Spectator
                one Spectator  5 개월 전

                Cool speech👍👍😁

                • Jessica Holting
                  Jessica Holting  6 개월 전

                  There are some women who want to get married and not have children. It is nice to have someone to wake up to, a life partner and a best friend.

                  • Jacinda Peters
                    Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                    All these bitter men are just mad we don't need them anymore.

                    • DJ_Trolly
                      DJ_Trolly  개월 전

                      @T K i'm still not marrying one of these women

                      • T K
                        T K  개월 전

                        @DJ_Trolly As long as your batteries don't die and there is plenty of boxed wine and cats for your party of one.

                        • AMLAN ADITYA MALLICK AMLAN ADITYA MALLICK

                          Yep, THOTS like you smashing walls are the beautiful scenery to be seen. I am so excited to all of you ending up with your cats.

                          • DJ_Trolly
                            DJ_Trolly  3 개월 전

                            Agreed! Single life is best

                            • amin zar
                              amin zar  7 개월 전

                              MGTOW4EVER

                              • Food Is My Weapon
                                Food Is My Weapon  8 개월 전

                                and to all the single men you'll most likely be in for a lifetime of despair and loneliness..

                                • Vincent Varghese
                                  Vincent Varghese  9 개월 전

                                  Marriage is not for everyone. And there is nothing wrong in being single also. But whatever decision you take, think a 100 times. The lady talking is not happy married. She should have stayed single. A family is a unit of a community. Some people feel fullfilled being married and obviously its not her. Looking back in history human beings lived married for 1000s of years and this history has programmed us to be fullfilled that way. Dont know if one fine day we can reverse all that.

                                  • Elle Jones
                                    Elle Jones  9 개월 전

                                    Never before has a TED talk made me angry, then there was today when I listened to this. Her husband must be so happy and proud. Someone who never wanted marriage but got married now tells those of us who want marriage that we're fine without it because she and other people are stressed. Clearly she and those people have completely missed the concept of marriage. Anything that requires selflessness and compromise is going to be stressful but that bond between two people to create from it is still beauty and never meant to be a picture perfect world. Hope her kids don't grow up hearing what a burden they have been to their mother!

                                    • Berlin Wall
                                      Berlin Wall  11 개월 전

                                      Thank you for this video. It gives me a good reason to not get married. Also, I don't agree with the last things you said in the video.

                                      • Garrett Mc
                                        Garrett Mc  년 전

                                        8:17 uh huh...

                                        • Garrett Mc
                                          Garrett Mc  년 전

                                          Sounds so mad talking like an argument

                                          • Garrett Mc
                                            Garrett Mc  년 전

                                            shes the definition of insanity

                                            • Garrett Mc
                                              Garrett Mc  년 전

                                              cant even listen to it all, just ranting

                                              • Rossana Motta
                                                Rossana Motta  년 전

                                                But married does not mean with kids. The misery she describes is almost all because of kids. That misery would be the same even if you were not married. Solution: not having kids. Besides that, I think married or not married, nothing changes. Being with someone can be great or miserable either way, the contract itself does not make the relationship good (though it can easily give a sense of suffocation)

                                                • Jacklynn Jackson
                                                  Jacklynn Jackson  년 전

                                                  what a b....

                                                  • Lucia Mixon
                                                    Lucia Mixon  년 전

                                                    Guess I'm a romantic. I get it. It's an obligation and full of responsibility. Being single in the last part of my life I feel like I've Already been doing tons of laundry, housework, and full time job. I have long term insurance. If I need it I hope that will pay claims! Frankly, many women would like to try with a compatible person. Committed not commitable? as far as bad breath there is listerine. Some folks need a partner or a friend at right time. Excellent talk to let us know it's not perfect hence so many divorces!

                                                    • John Something
                                                      John Something  7 개월 전

                                                      You also have to consider that not all marriages that end in divorce are considered a bad marriage. Not all marriages end on bad terms. Some people grow apart and divorce late, but that doesn't mean that they'd give up the great years that they did have.

                                                      • Maya Legrand
                                                        Maya Legrand  년 전

                                                        I laughed my head off! So funny, so true!

                                                        • Steve Laurie
                                                          Steve Laurie  년 전

                                                          Save your breath. I can sum it up for you in three easy words. DON'T GET MARRIED!

                                                          • Scott Nesjan
                                                            Scott Nesjan  년 전

                                                            Ha, buy a condo, build a pink bathroom...that's right ladies, keep up the consumerism and belief that material items will fill that void. ..then get cats when it's too late. ..

                                                            • Running Shoes
                                                              Running Shoes  년 전

                                                              When is this whole war against single people going to end?

                                                              • Wolfman7870
                                                                Wolfman7870  년 전

                                                                Capitalism is what is killing marriage. People are increasingly working harder for less just to funnel money into the pockets of a few unnecessarily wealthy people at the very top. We barely have enough time and money to get the things we need for ourselves much less spend our hard earned resources on temporary relationships.

                                                                • Live life To the fullest

                                                                  i’ve been married before and choosing to be single was one of the best decisions i’ve ever made! it has its lows but the highs are greater!

                                                                  • cedfowler
                                                                    cedfowler  년 전

                                                                    This is SO refreshing!

                                                                    • Wesley Chapman
                                                                      Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                      She says, "The woman pays the most for this dream." Seriously? So why do MEN DIE 6 years sooner, mainly from stress-related diseases, working themselves to an early grave, to PAY for the dream? While women control 85% of all spending decisions, the car and the house included. Why is it always the MAN who gets destroyed in divorce court, to enrich the woman, whenever she gets bored and files for divorce (and women DO file 70--80% of all divorces.) We ALL have to do housework, honey, unless you're rich enough to afford hired help. Only women are experts in complaining about it. This woman's whiny voice grates, like fingernails on a chalkboard. Yuck. This TEDx is AWFUL.

                                                                      • samie solanas
                                                                        samie solanas  11 개월 전

                                                                        Stop complaining old single man with no money ! You have no market value to women !

                                                                        • Running Shoes
                                                                          Running Shoes  년 전

                                                                          GET A JOB

                                                                          • Alina Ligia Dumitrescu

                                                                            than you very much!

                                                                            • Edgarv68
                                                                              Edgarv68  년 전

                                                                              The longer a woman stays single, the more useless they become, they can't lift anything heavy, they can't have children, they break down mentally, the list goes on.

                                                                              • Jacinda Peters
                                                                                Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                                                                                You're useless

                                                                                • Running Shoes
                                                                                  Running Shoes  년 전

                                                                                  LOL oh really now. That is the most bias thing I have ever heard.

                                                                                  • Cerasela Nicoleta Manole

                                                                                    Oh, thankyou!

                                                                                    • Amanda Hooke
                                                                                      Amanda Hooke  년 전

                                                                                      And then there is the women like me, who is a single mum, raising a child with a disability. It can be the challenging parts from both.

                                                                                      • Barb Thornell
                                                                                        Barb Thornell  년 전

                                                                                        Not to mention that multiple studies, repeated for decades in a row show that married men-as a group-are consistently the happiest people whereas married women-as a group-are consistently the unhappiest people. Gosh, I wonder why...

                                                                                        • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                          Christopher McAuley  6 개월 전

                                                                                          @Jacinda Peters Lots? Cause all I see are tons of interviews and articles like 'Where have all the good men gone?', articles about being happy when 30 and single. Know why? Cause they are all unhappy. Divorce? Really? 60% of marriages end in divorce. Most women divorced before 38. 1 in 4 women have depression. Women's happiness on the decline. What decade were women the happiest? 1950s 😂 Wonder why 🤔

                                                                                          • Jacinda Peters
                                                                                            Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                                                                                            @Christopher McAuley lots of single women are happier married women gain weight and drink more

                                                                                            • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                              Christopher McAuley  7 개월 전

                                                                                              What are you smoking? Women's happiness has been on the decline since the 60s 😂 Since the rise of single motherhood and divorce, women have been getting unhappier. They are more likely to suffer from depression. In the UK, women are most likely to commit suicide between 50 to 54 years of age. Wonder why? Women have higher levels of debt in their old age and less savings. Sorry, but statistics are not on your side here 🤨

                                                                                              • Barb Thornell
                                                                                                Barb Thornell  년 전

                                                                                                I saw all this when I was 16 (I'm 58 now) and never married because of it, which I don't at all regret. I am happier and healthier than ALL of the married women I know (according to THEIR own opinion/self-reporting) and often have to deal with what I can only describe as hostile envy of my freedom and control over my own time, resources, and attention. Not to mention my dating options (the worst "trigger topic" by far). I still would not even consider getting married.

                                                                                                • Marcus INfinity
                                                                                                  Marcus INfinity  개월 전

                                                                                                  58 glad to hear you nuns are living so long

                                                                                                  • the last Jedi
                                                                                                    the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                    @Jeanina Ribeiro lol

                                                                                                    • the last Jedi
                                                                                                      the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                      Well done ...we need more people like you ...the earth can only sustain 4 billion humans and there already are 7.5 .

                                                                                                      • Α
                                                                                                        Α  6 개월 전

                                                                                                        You would not be seeking validation on youtube if you were happy .Marriage died the day your ovaries dried up

                                                                                                        • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                                          Christopher McAuley  7 개월 전

                                                                                                          @Jeanina Ribeiro Can you please stop being sexist. Thought you'd be more pissed off at the guy 2 comments up who states that women are only interested in a man's money.

                                                                                                          • Phuong P
                                                                                                            Phuong P  년 전

                                                                                                            Feels super great after listening to Terri!

                                                                                                            • Halon One
                                                                                                              Halon One  년 전

                                                                                                              What a poor public speaker. The kicker is this lady can up and leave her husband tomorrow and is entitled to half his assets. She suffers no penalty under any circumstance. If she were to screw her neighbor and get pregnant by his child, she can still get child support from the her current husband. Marriage is a raw deal for men. Notice how biased Ted talks are in favor of women. Pathetic.

                                                                                                              • Tracy
                                                                                                                Tracy  년 전

                                                                                                                Wow, lots of pissy men in the comments. How dare single women be happy and have autonomy!

                                                                                                                • rasronin
                                                                                                                  rasronin  개월 전

                                                                                                                  Single men are happiest so your still losing now matter what you do.

                                                                                                                  • Running Shoes
                                                                                                                    Running Shoes  년 전

                                                                                                                    Wesley thank you. women don't want you either

                                                                                                                    • Wesley Chapman
                                                                                                                      Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                                                                      Why do millions of single women whine and complain that they can't find a good man? Because we men have all realized that marriage is a TRAP and whiny, complaining women aren't worth our time or money. MGTOW!

                                                                                                                      • Rustbelt Van-Life

                                                                                                                        😂😂

                                                                                                                        • Miss Scarleteen
                                                                                                                          Miss Scarleteen  년 전

                                                                                                                          I love this ❤️

                                                                                                                          • CanadaInjustice
                                                                                                                            CanadaInjustice  년 전

                                                                                                                            lol

                                                                                                                            • MexicanTacos 07
                                                                                                                              MexicanTacos 07  년 전

                                                                                                                              This comment section and this video are a perfect example of why men in the us don't want to get married anymore. Go find yourself a young russian housewife if you ask me😂

                                                                                                                              • slayerof truth
                                                                                                                                slayerof truth  년 전

                                                                                                                                All the single ladies is much happier without ring on it. Bitter men in comment section is funny.

                                                                                                                                • David Smith
                                                                                                                                  David Smith  개월 전

                                                                                                                                  @Christopher McAuley MGTOW.

                                                                                                                                  • the last Jedi
                                                                                                                                    the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                                                    Your grammar is funny

                                                                                                                                    • Jacinda Peters
                                                                                                                                      Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                                                                                                                                      They just can't handle the truth

                                                                                                                                      • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                                                                        Christopher McAuley  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                        MGTOW honey 😉😁😉😁😎

                                                                                                                                        • MonsterHuntressRoon

                                                                                                                                          When you need heavy lifting done or tons of groceries brought in it's not fine to be single. :/ I know this from personal experience.

                                                                                                                                          • Wesley Chapman
                                                                                                                                            Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                                                                                            When you are single, you can HIRE people to do heavy lifting...and a single's groceries are much lighter. Why do all of you "strong, empowered women" always complain about any physical exertion? Lazy much?

                                                                                                                                            • T T
                                                                                                                                              T T  년 전

                                                                                                                                              'Feminism', far from helping women, has instead exposed the full extent of female inferiority (moral, intellectual, physical, economic, spiritual, civic) far more visibly than was ever possible before 'feminism'. In the old days, there were customs that protected women from getting into situations where their inferiority would be visible. Not so anymore.

                                                                                                                                              • Jacinda Peters
                                                                                                                                                Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                Women back in the old days got abused.

                                                                                                                                                • Running Shoes
                                                                                                                                                  Running Shoes  년 전

                                                                                                                                                  Feminism today is more like feminazi.

                                                                                                                                                  • T T
                                                                                                                                                    T T  년 전

                                                                                                                                                    TED is now nothing more than an infomercial of female narcissism.

                                                                                                                                                    • John Something
                                                                                                                                                      John Something  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                      @samie solanas Female leaders have shown themselves to be just as warmongering as male leaders. There have just simply been more male leaders historically.

                                                                                                                                                      • samie solanas
                                                                                                                                                        samie solanas  11 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                        @Wesley Chapman then you should move to a war torn country and find peace in doing the manly job of destruction!

                                                                                                                                                        • Wesley Chapman
                                                                                                                                                          Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                                                                                                          Most of the world's mass media are a vast wasteland of female narcissism, greed, and romantic fantasies.

                                                                                                                                                          • SW Sweetie
                                                                                                                                                            SW Sweetie  년 전

                                                                                                                                                            I'm not getting married if I still have to work. I'm not interested in busting my hump at two jobs. One is enough.

                                                                                                                                                            • CCW Noob
                                                                                                                                                              CCW Noob  개월 전

                                                                                                                                                              If you feel your work is an overall negative, then time to find another career. If you feel your relationship(s) are overall negative, time to fix that too. Life is too short to be negative and to be eschewing things. Everything should be empowering and satisfying especially your career and your relationships. I hope you (and everyone else who feels this way) the best.

                                                                                                                                                              • Harry Barry
                                                                                                                                                                Harry Barry  8 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                @Wesley Chapman just exactly what I was going to say

                                                                                                                                                                • Wesley Chapman
                                                                                                                                                                  Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                  Busting your hump? Seriously? You wouldn't know hard work if you tripped and fell into it, face first. Women are so spoiled now, with all their conveniences and labor-saving devices. Yet all you do is whine & complain.

                                                                                                                                                                  • Tani
                                                                                                                                                                    Tani  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                    Perfect humor and true words

                                                                                                                                                                    • Panzer Hund
                                                                                                                                                                      Panzer Hund  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                      To all the poor people - you are fine. - rich guy

                                                                                                                                                                      • Faith Waithaka
                                                                                                                                                                        Faith Waithaka  3 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                        Lol

                                                                                                                                                                        • Α
                                                                                                                                                                          Α  6 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                          Lol she doesnt believe her own bs

                                                                                                                                                                          • Liza Lr
                                                                                                                                                                            Liza Lr  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                            i thank you so much for this..THANK YOU.

                                                                                                                                                                            • China Mai
                                                                                                                                                                              China Mai  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                              So true after having a family

                                                                                                                                                                              • Ginger Lee
                                                                                                                                                                                Ginger Lee  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                This is funny

                                                                                                                                                                                • Green_Waldo
                                                                                                                                                                                  Green_Waldo  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                  I imagine her husband is miserable.

                                                                                                                                                                                  • Tree seer
                                                                                                                                                                                    Tree seer  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                    Marriage is encouraged because it helps the economy make more money. This was a really good video!! Especially the end.

                                                                                                                                                                                    • rasronin
                                                                                                                                                                                      rasronin  개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                      Tree seer your premise is nonsense. Marriage is encouraged because it provides the best environment for raising kids. Mix in some monogamy and you totally eradicate stds. Single mothers cost the economy more money as you put it. They raise unhealthy children with a higher chance of crime, imprisonment and suicide. They require more public assistance for food and shelter and are generally a drain on economies. Married people are less of a drain on the economy and therefore the economy is stronger. Marriage between two loving partners especially normal straight couples who have been socialized and matured will always have an advantage over single mothers or fathers. Men can learn a lot from women and women definitely can learn a lot from men.

                                                                                                                                                                                      • Andrew s
                                                                                                                                                                                        Andrew s  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                        Stephen B She's right, Marriage encourages men to contribute to the labor force and to the consumer market on behalf of their wives and children.

                                                                                                                                                                                        • Stephen B
                                                                                                                                                                                          Stephen B  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                          Sunflowershowers lol wrong

                                                                                                                                                                                          • Zarina Sultan
                                                                                                                                                                                            Zarina Sultan  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                            Thank you, thank you, thank you!

                                                                                                                                                                                            • HybridEnergy
                                                                                                                                                                                              HybridEnergy  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                              You're not supposed to go to work like the guy and then also take care of the house work, but feminism won that for you so like enjoy.

                                                                                                                                                                                              • Dahl'n Salvs
                                                                                                                                                                                                Dahl'n Salvs  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                Oh I will get married, have kids. darn I think I made a mistake. Single ladies don't do it. I know because I 'm now miserable. mwahahahaha!

                                                                                                                                                                                                • Joe Smith
                                                                                                                                                                                                  Joe Smith  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                  Marriage is an antiquated, dying institution. Only problem is it's not dying fast enough.

                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Kristen B
                                                                                                                                                                                                    Kristen B  3 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                    Wesley Chapman no, hateful sexist men like yourself killed it.Stop blaming us for your failures.

                                                                                                                                                                                                    • Wesley Chapman
                                                                                                                                                                                                      Wesley Chapman  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                      @Dela Flowers: Western civilization IS dying, while we watch. And feminism killed it.

                                                                                                                                                                                                      • craigmak
                                                                                                                                                                                                        craigmak  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                        Why are so many women single? They have become shallow, delusional and act like teenage girls when looking for a man. Long gone are women valuing the worthwhile traits of a hardworking, honest, loyal man. These modern women seek only tall, good looking, fit men with a large bank account. Basically the immature, teen girl's dream guy. Even overweight women with poor attitudes and little education think they are entitled to the cream of the crop. Men are choosing to opt out because they are sickened by current female values and the necessity to trade down. A female 5 is only interested in a male 7+. Men are becoming disinterested in this unfair trade as well as women's ability to take half their wealth at any time. 70% of divorces are initiated by women with with something to gain financially. Sticking around only for the good times and wealth, leaving a guy high and dry when things get rough. Not to mention ripping him from his children which he pays for. Men have very little to gain compared to the risks. The modern, entitled, oppressive, woman has very little to offer a man. Trade a life of autonomy, self improvement and peace for nagging, drama, financial burden and a 70% chance to lose his wealth? Really bad deal. Really, really bad deal for men today.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        • Machine Gaming
                                                                                                                                                                                                          Machine Gaming  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                          All true, except one thing. A female 5 is only interested in a male *9+*. But nowadays, even a 9 alpha male is finding it very difficult to get women, unless he is *rich*.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          • thewhitehermit
                                                                                                                                                                                                            thewhitehermit  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                            these Ted talks are now officially a fucking joke. all these man hating 4th wave feminists are pathetic. always complaining that life is hard for woman in america. us men have it way harder in America and we are tired of woman only caring about themselves when they have it easier overall. woman in this country have it better than any class of people have ever had it in human history.

                                                                                                                                                                                                            • MexicanTacos 07
                                                                                                                                                                                                              MexicanTacos 07  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                              slayerof truth Oh really? So in what senario is it better to be a man then a woman in america?

                                                                                                                                                                                                              • slayerof truth
                                                                                                                                                                                                                slayerof truth  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                USA men have it way easier. You are just so entitled you cant stand not getting everything think you deserve. Everything you moan about is caused by men.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                • The Midnight Surf
                                                                                                                                                                                                                  The Midnight Surf  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  If you are a young man, let's say age 19-25 reading this... Do Not Get Married! You have been warned lads.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • samie solanas
                                                                                                                                                                                                                    samie solanas  11 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Tell that to all the males in the comment section trying to gaslight women or pressurise them to get married lol

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • Dahl'n Salvs
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Dahl'n Salvs  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      The Midnight Surf mwahahahahaha!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • ujgilani
                                                                                                                                                                                                                        ujgilani  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        most of the things she is mentioning they only last for just first five years of the child birth. so I guess we can sacrifice the 5 years of our life to experience the most beautiful thing in this world "being a mom or dad"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • FICTIONfran
                                                                                                                                                                                                                          FICTIONfran  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          @Roz B you are totally right. It is hard to find love, because not everybody is for everybody. Now that we have more freedom than 50 years ago, it is hard to select the right lifestyle for yourself, because not every lifestyle is for everybody. I had a terrible car accident and my health isnt so great anymore. It is better for me to not have kids. I have 3 nieces and they exhaust me quite a bit. Why forcing myself and make me and the kids unhappy? That would be selfish!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • FICTIONfran
                                                                                                                                                                                                                            FICTIONfran  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            @John Something but not everybody is like you. My dad would not go into a torture chamber for me, he mainly thinks about what he needs and wants me to deliver happiness to him. Be interested in what he finds important. My grandmother had 4 kids when actually she is a cold fish and has a favourite child, the other 3 are not important to her. When I was younger, she did not give me her home made christmas decoration, but she sold it to me. I didnt even get a family discount 🤑 So... not everybody is made for being a selfless parent!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • John Something
                                                                                                                                                                                                                              John Something  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              @realist It's hard to explain. Unless you've experienced it, it can't be fully understood. Think of how you love something...the thing or person you love more than anybody else. Multiply that by a thousand and you might start to describe what it's like to have a child. I would literally go into a torture chamber and have them pick me apart limb from limb, before I'd allow my child to be harmed. For my daughter, I'd sacrifice everything I have, including my life. And I wouldn't hesitate to do it.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • Roz B
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Roz B  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                To someone who is not matured enough to sacrifice 5 years, that is not the best thing ever. To someone who is selfish ... not the best thing as well. To someone who doesn't like responsibilities... not at all. Happiness varies from person to person. Something that gives you joy may not to others. We should respect choices of each other provided that they are not hurting anyone or anything

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • Jamie Ward
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Jamie Ward  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Life is hard. Some of the most difficult tasks such as raising a child or maintaining a relationship are the most rewarding though. I'm not afraid of having children of my own because I know it will be hard but one of greatest experiences of my life. I won't regret spreading love, even if it requires puke and poop. Being alone and not working hard is boring and unfulfilling even if it's the most enjoyable. Nothing will make me happier then to keep pushing myself, loving myself and loving others.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Roz B
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Roz B  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Jamimi Storms what is important to you may not be important to others. What brings happiness to you may not bring happiness to others. Some people are wired like you and some are not. I think we should learn to respect the choices of other individuals provided they are not hurting anyone or anything

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • N later
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      N later  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      this was amazing! on point

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • Emma Frost
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Emma Frost  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        I enjoy being alone,I like to have a chitchat and befriend with everyone I meet without having a jealous boyfriend glaring at us. I would feel very unsafe in a relationship and due to bad experiences I no longer want to bond. Just date nights and after that you can leave. It's a less aggressive form of hump and dump.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • Running Shoes
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Running Shoes  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Stephen you're still being "HUMP and DUMP at the end. Work both ways sweetie.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • Stephen B
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Stephen B  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Emma Frost you are still being pump and dumped at the end

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • thethankfullservant
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              thethankfullservant  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              you can be single all you want but when you get around 40 and hit the wall don't ask where are all the good men go or trapping men into having children they don't want

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • Jacinda Peters
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Jacinda Peters  6 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                You sounds like you like 12 year olds.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • Shay Monte'
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Shay Monte'  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  im starting to think men are trying to convince women that you want 12 year olds. wait no your white ppl your women AND men look 80 at 30, guess your statements make sense lol

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Machine Gaming
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Machine Gaming  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    40?! Try 30, and sooner still if they wear a lot of fakeup, which rapidly ages the skin.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • SooMuchMore
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      SooMuchMore  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      I am grinning ear-to-ear. This is sooo lovely!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • peachie05
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        peachie05  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Cue the manbabies to come forward to start bitching and complaining about the content in this video, as they bitch and complain about any choice women make these days. smh

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • Rabia Shakoor
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Rabia Shakoor  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Ah, the manbaby shows himself. LOL. "Emotional intelligence of a 6 year old" *writes run on sentence about someone he doesn't know about insulting their intelligence and their worthiness of men*

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • Daniël V
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Daniël V  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Cue the prissy radfem with the emotional intelligence of a 6 year-old to start bitching and complaining about imagined problems as they bitch and complain about anything because they are rather dim-witted and can't cope with reality, which is that they are not worthy of a man.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • mike mikey
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              mike mikey  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              how come TED doesn't give a talk on no-fault divorce, alimony and child support?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • Marcus INfinity
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Marcus INfinity  개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                @samie solanas men don't cause war. It happens in nature. Limited Resources cause war. And men participate in combat because women are weak and cannot

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • 3lit3gn0m3
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  3lit3gn0m3  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  This got pretty misandric at the end... I understand that I'm not her target audience, but as a male, she's a reminder to me that even my best will never be good enough for women in our society. It does make me feel content in being perpetually single, at least.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Casy
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Casy  11 일 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    But as male..this isnt geared to you..

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • the last Jedi
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      @samie solanas poor wahmen ..it seems you bf cheated on you with a better looking girl.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • the last Jedi
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Dude I m indian and I studied in Texas and before I went there I was this opinion that western women are beautiful , intelligent and have good interpersonal skills but I was wrong they are worst kind I have ever encountered

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • Jyotsna Roy
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Jyotsna Roy  11 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          @samie solanas awwww daddy and bf both walked out on you honey that's why so miserable ...trying to get some attention feel so sorry for you

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • samie solanas
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            samie solanas  11 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            All men no matter how pathetic they are consider themselves as the "best " lol overconfidence

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • michaels33
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              michaels33  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              So, a married women who has a job, and does the majority of the work taking care of her household, differs from single woman...how exactly? Sounds like she wants a divorce. Her hubby better start protecting his assets. She's gonna walk in and drop the bomb one day by surprise.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • Sad Hossein
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Sad Hossein  5 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                exactly when you are single, you take care of yourself only.. a married woman is taking care of at least two people... mostly a messy guy and if there are kids.... again the majority of the work is with the mom

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • violetcomette
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  violetcomette  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  It differs, because a single woman has to clean only after herself (and sometimes after her guests). A wife has to clean after her husband and her children daily. And I'm saying this as an engaged 20 yo woman. When my fiance went away for two weeks, it was much easier for me to keep the house clean. Also when I went away he told me it is much cleaner than when I was there. It is just that it is easier to clean after only yourself and take responsibility for your mess. When somebody else makes a mess it is always more irritating and noticeable than when it's you who made the mess.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Rozmic
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Rozmic  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    You should do standup.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • peachie05
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      peachie05  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      She probably earns more than her husband, like so many women do today. She should start protecting her assets so her husband doesn't steal them. Damn gold digging men.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Christopher McAuley  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        This is so funny! 😅 Hey ladies, don't get married and have kids. Like I did 😅 I used to be interested in... useless shit that added nothing to my life. Oscars, TV shows, alcohol. That's the message? Marriage is hard. Children are hard. No, you don't always get what you want in a relationship. Fact. Ladies, follow her advice. Go for it ☺ Then, when your 70, alone, have no kids, no grandchildren, and your brothers, sisters, and cousins can't visit cause they're too busy with there own familie. Come back and tell me that the big 401K, the pink bathroom, watching the Oscars, and having seen every episode of Game of Thrones makes you feel fulfilled. Instead of those thousands of pictures of you and you children. The first time your child suckled on your breast, the first time your child finished a whole meal, stood up themselves, said ma ma for the first time. How you cried a little on their first day of school. How your child looked at you as if you are they only person in the universe. And you know that they love you, in a way no one else well. That time you were so proud of them for coming first in that competition. Or when they graduated college, fell in love, had their first kid. These are the moments we remember on our death bed. Not who the star of some movie in 2005 was. Look around you apartment at all the stuid, little shitty momentos we keep. Why keep them? Because those are the moments that will really matter. The moments with the best of friends! The moments with family! Enjoy the pink marble 😅😅

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • Barb Thornell
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Barb Thornell  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          @Christopher McAuley Well, judging by the extreme jealousy and hostility exhibited by the marriedwithchildren women who unabashedly drip their bitterness and envy at me over my freedom and comfort level and fairly spit fire about the fact I am not even a "lonely old cat woman" (I live quite happily sharing the expenses of a rented house with four single men of four different age groups) a fair number of women are already doing that. And, sorry to burst your bubble but, it wasn't the TedX lady or anyone like her that instilled the notion that marriage and children is not the best or happiest option for everyone - it was my father who was always far more concerned about the happiness, health, and personal welfare of his children than he was about conforming to any political, social, or religious agenda. He well knew that, given the freedom, some would elect for more standard arrangements and some wouldn't. Which is exactly what happened - two of the four of us chose standard arrangements and two of us didn't. As far as "enjoying the pink marble*...thanks, because I am. I was raised by someone smart enough to know that unhitched doesn't mean alone. Only if you are foolish enough to think that only one type of relationship is valuable or valid will that happen...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Christopher McAuley  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            @Barb Thornell You are a single, never married, childless individual, yes? If so, more power to do! Go for it. But, since you didn't actually understand my comment, 'Don't do it just because some chick on Ted Talks told you to'. Our, do you think it's okay for a mother to basically state that if given the chance again, she wouldn't have had the children that she actually has?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • Christopher McAuley
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Christopher McAuley  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              @John Something Exactly 😉

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • John Something
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                John Something  7 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                @Christopher McAuley " Mansplaining? What is that?" It was intended as a term to explain how some men speak patronizingly to women about subjects that they don't think they know anything about, BECAUSE they're a woman. It has evolved since then by some rad fems to just be a shut down of all opinions expressed by men who disagree with them. Essentially, you are a man and you have a different opinion than peachie05. Instead of debating you or trying to have her own opinion and offer up the merits of her own argument or point, she took the intellectually lazy way out and dismissed you because you're a man. But it's totally not sexist, because of some inherent power structure thingy.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • Hokibukisa
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Hokibukisa  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Some of the worst advice ever given. Do you feel good about yourself knowing that you've increased the number of suicidal elderly that you've created? Women in their 30s that you've convinced to quit and give up at the slightest hint of a downside? They'll be rich, lonely, and miserable. Comfortably and quietly miserable, just like the men. Its a gender neutral reality that the biggest regret of the childless elderly that they never had children. You think you're being kind hearted? The women you effected with this video will one day be 80 and alone. When you constantly continue to lie to yourself, don't worry about it theres still time until ACTUALLY NO THERE ISN'T and then one day you're fucking 80. Well I hope you're happy with yourself Terri Hilmey.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • Machine Gaming
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Machine Gaming  년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    That is because most 80-year-old women don't treat men nearly as poorly as most younger ones do. As far as men's treatment of women, it is practically worship nowadays, and this is obvious if you take a glimpse at any ancient society.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    • peachie05
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      peachie05  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Most 80 year olds I see have great circles of friends. WTF are you talking about, "alone?" Stupid shit.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      • Michael Braunschild
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Michael Braunschild  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Terri sounds like an unhappy women, I feel sorry for the husband. I am sure he wants out, but he will lose everything!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        • L Mc
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          L Mc  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          the other Ted talk with the fat lady with the phd who is single is a hoot . not sure about this one, not bad looking but she looks like a bit of a cow. pro tip to ladies we dont like women who act like men, we would be gay otherwise

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          • L Mc
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            L Mc  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            I didn't say she looks like a cow, its a term for someone who is miserable or bad tempered. Feminism has made at least 1/3 of women undatable or one would be a fool to marry or live with them.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            • Emily Adamson
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Emily Adamson  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              L Mc We also don't want men who think about women in this way, asshole. No woman deserves to be spoken to like this. A cow? Really? WOMEN ARE PEOPLE. I could gladly point out the amount of men walking around that look like cows. Pro tip ladies, men who treat other women like this are disgusting and terrible partners. We still live in a misogynistic society and it's up to us to find the men that don't think like this.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              • GICking
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                GICking  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                I hope there was a talk given by a married man after this talk.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                • Fida Aifiya
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Fida Aifiya  2 년 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  when i was in primary school, a teacher told us to write our future plans and dreams, and i wrote "not married, not having children", then the whole class laughed at me and saw me as a joke eversince. I was 10 years old.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  • the last Jedi
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    the last Jedi  4 개월 전

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Your face makes me laugh ...btw be happy be single ...we need more people who opt out of Marriage anyways